Why dreaming is a trap

So for days/months/years, you’ve been dreaming of where your life will end up & what you will achieve. Some of you have dreamed of traveling to other parts of the world. Others will have dreamed of their ideal career and how amazing it will be to live that life. Others still will have dreamed of other things like their ideal body shape, a family-filled or family-free life… Dreaming is limitless.

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[Shonda Rhimes]

Therein lies the problem.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s fun to dream as it gives you a nice break from reality. I’ve dreamed of many things, including becoming a professional dancer, musician, even a baker. But dreaming is both amazing and terrible, for while it’s great to acquire a vision of where you wish you were and want to be, it’s far too easy to get lost in that vision and never actually experience it first-hand.

Why is that?

Well, what’s easier? Closing your eyes and immediately fantasizing about being an A-list movie star the world fawns over, or taking many years to go to school, attend workshops, participate in various acting gigs, find the right gigs to build your name, workworkwork, all to MAYBE become an A-list movie star if it works in your favour?

Okay, here’s a simpler example: is it easier to imagine yourself eating your most favourite dessert in the world, or actually going out, getting your dessert, and shoveling it in your mouth? Even with this concept, though it’s only a little bit more effort, the action of DOING it definitely takes more effort than simply dreaming of it.

And let’s be honest here, in order to make your dreams a reality there are plenty of hurdles to overcome, hardships to bear, and heavy loads of stress to get through; the thought of going through all that work and frustration makes it harder to want to bother, and the uncertainty of what the future holds is just plain scary. Yet when you dream of something, you can see everything happen instantly, seamlessly, with no problems to be dealt with, making it the easiest and “bestest” thing to do.

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You’d only be partially wrong with that thought process. Trying to make your dream a reality truly does fuck up your life, BUT, if you persevere, you could live your dream, nay, your reality, for as long as you’re willing to make it happen. The unfortunate truth, however, is that most of us aren’t willing to put ourselves out there and go through the crap we need to deal with, for the many years it takes, to get there. There’s no instant gratification which our world today seems to be based off of (want to buy something but can’t afford it right now? Use a credit card! Hungry but don’t want to cook? Order in! Trying to do something and it’s not working? Fuck it, do something else!), and since it’s so damn easy for us to turn a blind eye to something we don’t like/understand/want/etc., we in turn have become spoiled citizens of our privileged world who expect the best right away and no less.

Unconsciously we expect/hope for our dreams to be handed to us and, if we can’t have our dreams, we’ll continue to dream about it as an escape with the hope that it will suddenly materialize into reality at the blink of an eye. We all know it doesn’t work that way, yet everyone still wishes it were, without having to exude any effort on their part and thus not getting anything done to get them closer TO their dream.

You lose yourself in your dream –> you do nothing to achieve your dream –> you wish your dream were real –> repeat.

Few are able to get out of this loop, that doesn’t mean that you can’t. Simply being aware of it happening is the biggest step to get out of the trap; use your dreams to build a plan instead of using them to avoid reality while you bide your time in the hopes things will happen for you. ‘Cause they won’t. It’s up to you. And if you don’t do it, your dreams will forever be an escape from reality instead of a welcome, real-life part of it.

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